A study of two “Dangerous Ducks” reveals the Secret to a Long Life and benefits of Mental Wellness. Two old ladies embark on a trip to Hermanus in an escapade of frivolous fun. The road trip is the result of seeking Mental Wellness, after many months of Covid-19 restrictions. It is also reminds us of the Secrets to a Long Life. Let me begin:
Aunty Marg and Aunty Dee, pictured above, are both in the Eighties. They are both widowed. Aunty Marg was married 58 years. She lost her husband three days after regulations placed South Africa under Level 6 Lockdown restrictions in March 2020. Aunty Dee watched her husband slowly succumb to illness, several years ago. The Aunts have been friends since they met while training to be teachers more than 60 years ago. As a result, the story is a delightful one of a long friendship over decades.
The impact of Covid – 19 restrictions
The impact of Covid Lockdown restrictions has caused social devastation for the elder communities. There have been stories of room restrictions without other human contact in a form of solitary confinement. In addition, Retirement village restrictions prevented family contact and freedom of movement. Sadly, spousal and partner deaths left grieving survivors in solitude. After that, the pandemic caused financial uncertainty as pension and investments could not withstand economic slow-down.
The result of these issues is a narrower focus for our elder folk. With less social interaction, less mobility and negative media, it is difficult to look beyond the bedroom wall or the perimeter fence of the retirement village. Life has become mundane, and goalless. It has a dramatic effect on Long Life and Mental Wellness. Aunty Marg and Aunty Dee suffered these restrictions too. Somehow, they have retained their perspective that there is life beyond the pandemic.
Hermanus here we come
The excitement of the trip to Hermanus has built over a number of months. The “old-gals” have overcome the government restrictions, the mental restraints, and the emotional fears of Covid-19. Subsequently they decide they could make it to Hermanus. For two “Dangerous Ducks” to embark on a short trip like this, they had to take preliminary steps to freedom. From the Southern Suburbs in Cape Town, the first trip was a drive to Blaauwberg Beach. They followed up with a swim at Fish Hoek on the South Peninsula. Closer to home, there was a social meeting of friends at Kirstenbosch or fetching a grandchild from outlying suburbs. And after this there was the discussion of safety for two “old birds” travelling independently. The nagging concerns of safety on the road, emergency issues, a hijacking or attack. The threat to one’s safety is a real issue, especially when the potential victims are senior citizens.
Having overcome these “minor” issues an inner confidence grew. Aunty Marg and Aunty Dee ignored the apparent dangers, and enjoyed a social drive to a favourite childhood town. The trip included a swim in the sea at Voëlklip, and a quiet restaurant lunch. After lunch they sauntered on the path above the harbour, before returning home to Cape Town. The enthusiastic report of the trip and the plans for a future event, were confirmation of the success. The two older dames are ready for the world.
The lessons learned
My role as observer of this event, was one of pure pleasure. It was lovely to see the excitement, the growing confidence, and the positive outlook for the future. Simultaneously, I was reminded of two areas of our lives that need our attention. These are: Secrets to a Long life and Mental Wellness.
Bodyworlds – observations of a Long and Happy Life
My first exposure to the Secrets of a Long and Happy Life was at Bodyworlds exhibition in South Africa. The exhibits displayed in fine detail, how our bodies knit together. In each hall the visitor can observe impressive views of our bodies from the inside, out. Following an examination of each exhibit, I arrived at the final hall where simple photographic posters adorned the walls.
The posters displayed lifestyles of older folk, entitled – The Secrets to a Long and Happy Life. The emphasis is on a Long Life and Mental Wellness. The information contained in the posters, reflected results of a study of Centenarians from Okinawa, Japan.
Interestingly, Okinawa is a Japanese Archipelago with a high concentration of Centenarians – people over the age of one hundred years. The study revealed that a long and happy life, is mainly due to “balance.” I noted these points and have reflected on them periodically. Aunty Marg and Aunty Dee’s trip was a reminder of the principles of the Secrets to Long and Happy Life, and Mental Wellness.
More importantly, these principles have immense value for us as we navigate our existence in a post-pandemic, uncertain society. Herewith a list of eight secrets:
Optimism (Ikigai) – a mantra for Longevity (A Long Life)
The trip to Hermanus reflected a sense of optimism. A jaunt to redeem a Long Life and Mental Wellness. Aunty Marg and Aunty Dee were excited by the prospect of escaping the city and doing something different. It did not involve much planning, but it was a positive step, a pro-active event, a moment of pleasure. Since 2020, much of life has been the opposite. I am reminded to lift one’s eyes to hills. Take a look to the horizon to get a unique perspective, so that you are not bogged down by circumstances
Hara Hachi Bu – Less is more
The Japanese use the term ‘Hara Hachi Bu’ to relate to the quantity we eat. The Secret to a Long and Happy life is to eat until you are 80% full. Thus, you maintain a daily intake of 1900 calories.
I would like to suggest that in the 21st Century we apply this principle of ‘less is more’ to all areas of our lives. The drive for wealth, possessions and success has created a selfish, self-centred society. We know this already as we look at the abuse of power and the vast discrepancy between wealth and poverty. None of it is necessary to live a Long and Happy Life. If we start with a daily intake of 80% of our capacity, we are sure to improve health and attitude. Certainly, to scale back our materialism by 20% we can develop the Secrets of a Long and Happy Life.
Mean something to someone – friendships across generational divides
There are two concepts in this single phrase: mean something to someone and friendships across generational divides. The first concept Aunty Marg and Aunty Dee have practiced for years. Although they spent years in different South African cities, whenever they met, they restored their friendship. They mean something to each other. The principle applies to all of us: Beyond work associates, colleagues, and family there are people to meet and love. And beyond checking the boxes of a Facebook friend or Instagram follower, a LinkedIn Connection or Contact List entry – there is more. Be significant even if only to one person.
The second concept is an interesting idea, and one which I have observed Aunty Marg practising throughout her life. Aunty Marg has friends like Aunty Dee, but over her lifetime she has also cultivated friendships across generations. She has formed friendships with children of friends, of younger colleagues, or children of acquaintances. At eighty-one years, she is still invited out to tea, lunch, or a walk, by people less than half her age. These friends seek her out when visiting Cape Town and make a special effort to meet with her. They are glad of her company and conversation. It is not charity.
The interesting point regarding friendships across generational divides, is that they benefit both parties. The wisdom of age and experience provides the younger person another perspective to the view of life. Similarly, the energy and aspirations of youth provide the older person insight to, and curiosity of, the next generation. For both participants there is benefit to the relationship which inspires a desire for a longer life.
A Purposeful Life contributes to a Long Life and Mental Wellness
A purposeful life is the fourth principle expressed at Bodyworlds. It describes a person engaged in their community. Aunty Marg and Aunty Dee have been involved in their communities as mothers, teachers, churchgoers, and more. While they may be slowing they still have an outlook of life which is purposeful. They continue to build relationships with grand-children and bake biscuits for friends and family. They read, knit and sew for those in need, or deliver the local paper to a neighbour. There is also time for a banter with a “car-guard” at the local shopping center. It may appear insignificant to our younger generation, but it is a reminder of a positive approach to life.
Eat a Rainbow
A Secret to a Long and Happy Life is to eat a rainbow. Practically speaking it means that a variety of colours should fill your plate. Unfortunately, we cannot just be meat and potato people. We need a touch of colour to adjust our taste buds, renew your cells and revitalize your metabolism. It is a simple principle which McDonald’s, Butler’s Pizza and Steers cannot deliver with conviction, so try an alternative.
The Curative Power of Nature
As Aunty Marg and Aunty Dee show us in their trip to Hermanus, the curative power of nature. They beat their urban drag and took a breath of fresh air in a different town. Of course, the curative power of nature is best practiced when you take your foot off the gas. For us we need to try walk, run, swim, cycle, anything to “change lanes.” We enjoy so many experiences of freedom, refreshment, and upliftment in nature.
As an example of the positive effect of nature, I share a story of meeting Mark. Mark, to me, was a little odd and not a person with whom I immediately built a good rapport. In fact, I was aloof and kept my distance from him. That is, until one day when we found ourselves in the sea together. We were body-surfing waves for around two to three hours at a time. Mark and I connected, we enjoyed each other’s company, we enjoyed the swim, we became friends.
The relationship we developed was based on the curative power of nature. I overcame my hang-ups of Mark through a swim in the sea – no conversation required.
Exercise & Motion as a Way of Life
Exercise & Motion is a human discipline. Whether we walk in the park, run trails, or any leisure activity, we demonstrate exercise and motion. A Secret to a Long and Happy Life is to maintain the disciplines of human movement. There is not much more to add – it is like Optimism; it is a decision which you make.
Lifelong Learning & Engaging with the World
The last principle of a Long Life and Mental Wellness is lifelong learning. Essentially, it is to live a life of curiosity. If we are curious, we constantly look at the world through a lens of learning rather than stagnation. Through curiosity, we reach out to others to ask questions, look for signs of interest, to gather information. Furthermore we assess our understanding.
I recently described to my wife that our future relationship with our adult children depends on how interesting we are. As parents, we will always be interested in our children. However, we need to ensure that we remain interesting to them. I added, that I believe that lifelong learning and engagement with the world is a channel to remaining interesting. In my view, this is a significant Secret to a Long and Happy Life.
Mental Wellness
The principles which are evident in the Japanese Centenarians of Okinawa support the need for a life of balance. Like our bodies which continually seek a state of homeostasis, so our Mental Wellness is dependent upon balance. The two “Dangerous Ducks” demonstrate how they try to maintain Mental Wellness. The Secrets of a Long and Happy Life are a good guide for us to follow.
The current global outlook is that Mental Illness will be a major Chronic disease by the year 2030. Covid-19 has not made that easier. The story of the “Dangerous Ducks” is a reminder that we can help ourselves. Fortunately, we also have organizations like Work Mind Matters, which we are happy to endorse, as service providers. Work Mind Matters is able to provide Mental Wellness programmes for your organization to strengthen Mental Wellness in the workplace.
Close
The next time you hear that your aged Uncle or Aunt, have embarked on an adventure, don’t worry. Support them. They are taking steps to a Long and Happy Life. Isn’t it time you do that too?
